One Year Ago Today

At this time last year, Tony and I were in Seoul for our first trip. We were there for just under one week, during which time we had the opportunity to see Oliver twice (one-hour sessions each time). We landed late Sunday night and had our first meeting early Monday morning -- which worked out okay with us thanks to a combo of jet lag and nerves!

A few spelling and grammar errors aside, I documented our journey fairly well via this blog. Therefore, there’s no need to re-hash what has already been posted. Instead, feel free to check out the posts or just the photos on these below pages. I just cried my way through them!

On Our Way 

The Moment

Our Second Meeting

Court

Eating in Korea

Home & More Photos

One year ago today Oliver became real. Not a photo, not a reason to complete a slew of paperwork, not a reason to clean out the spare bedroom…but a real person. With personality! How amazing, terrifying, emotional and overwhelming that first meeting was. To be truthful, some of those first moments are a bit fuzzy in my memory. Did he call us “Mommy and Daddy” or “Umma and Appa”? What did the Foster Mother say? I can’t recall. There was so much going on, emotionally and physically, that it is a bit of a blur. I suppose many of the bigger life events are that way.

After all of that waiting, planning and traveling, we finally met. I wonder how our emotions compare to new parents meeting their just-born child in the hospital room? Maybe they are very similar, even with such different circumstances. A mix of “oh my goodness how amazing” and “oh my goodness what do I do now”! 

Meeting Oliver meant that we finally had a tangible little person to think about, a voice to hear in our minds, a touch to recall. Today, his laughter warms our hearts, his joy and happiness are contagious, and we feel so very blessed to be his parents. Naturally, to mark this occasion he was up extremely early (he woke when I got up to work out), was in a sweet mood for a bit, but then got rather cranky and challenging. Just a reminder that life with a toddler is full of surprises, love, tantrums and unpredictability! 

Here are two Meyers style selfies taken this morning. Such a different way to start the day than one year ago. I am so happy!

The forehead bruise proves Oliver is a regular kiddo, often getting bumps and bruises.
We are thankful that we have not yet had to get stitches or had any serious injuries! 

My little guy! Such a sweetie (when he wants to be, which luckily is much of the time).

Love.

Progress

Kids love applesauce, right!? Well, not THIS kid. We offered Oliver applesauce in all sorts of ways — plain, colored, flavored, as a dip for cookies, in a squeezer. Friends offered him applesauce. He wouldn’t touch it (or in the case of the squeezer, he promptly spit it out everywhere). When we started OT, they had him do messy play with applesauce and tried to get him to taste it, but once again he refused.

Sunday afternoon I was looking for something to keep him busy and asked if he’d like to do messy play with applesauce. He said yes, so I started getting everything out. Then he asked…

I taste it?

What? Did he really just ask to taste the applesauce? I (casually) said “Sure” and opened up the jar of plain, unsweetened applesauce. I asked if he wanted to taste it with his funny spoon (something the OT gave us) and he said yes.

I scooped him out a small bite. He ate it. Then he started licking the lid and he said,

More?

Wow! Of course buddy, you can eat some applesauce. So we got a small bowl of applesauce and this happened:

He proceeded to clean the bowl.

More applesauce please?

Why yes, no problem! 

I know this is a very small thing, but it feels like a great victory (with no recent effort). He is always refusing to try foods, so having him ask for it, actually try it, and finally to like it is a big step forward. Yeah!

Oliver is also quite excited for Christmas and recently began to like foot jammies (last winter he panicked anytime we tried to put them on him). I had the opportunity to visit Target without Oliver in tow and found some cute Christmas themed foot jammies. I couldn’t wait until after Thanksgiving to give them to him, and he insisted on wearing them right away. Here is Oliver, early this morning giving us his best “Ho Ho Ho Merry Christmas”! Such a cutie…

My Brave Son

Dear Oliver,

As we approach the one-year anniversary of meeting each other, I find myself reflecting on your journey. Thinking about this brings tears to my eyes; tears of both joy and sorrow. You have shown so much bravery that it is hard to imagine that you are only three years old.

I imagine your confusion at why your Umma kept showing you pictures of strangers and taught you to call them Mommy and Daddy. Strange faces and strange words, maybe it just seemed like a game. Then you met with these strangers twice, and they kept trying to touch you, hold you, hug you and play with you. The bubbles were fun and you eventually warmed up, but their words didn’t make any sense and you were okay with your play time being up.

And then…unexpectedly your Umma and Appa and brother probably began to be sad. They tried to help you understand what was about to happen. They tried to prepare you (and themselves), but once again it didn’t really make sense. And early one morning Umma and brother loaded bags of your things into the car. They dressed you for what would be the last time, putting you in some of your best and most favorite clothes. You arrived at a familiar place and once again saw those two people you called Mommy and Daddy, but whom you didn’t know. After a while your Umma and brother left you with these new people. 

I am the one who held you in the van as we drove away from that familiar place, heading for the unfamiliar. I tried to comfort you as you screamed and thrashed. I saw your fear, heard your fear. And yet, after resting in our apartment you bravely allowed us to care for you. Feed you, bathe you, dress you, change you. You showed us how you liked to play, opened up to us a little bit. There was still fear, but there was also bravery as you faced each day.

Your journey since that first day has been full of bravery. Trusting us, allowing us to get to know you, allowing yourself to get to know us. Living in a strange new house in a strange new land. Living in a place where you couldn’t understand what was being said. Feeling so much pain and sadness at all you lost, yet finding joy each day in your new home and with your new family. 

Oliver, you amaze me. You are so brave, so strong. Loving and joyful, funny, full of life. My love for you is so great, far deeper than anything I could have imagined. And as we near the anniversary of our first meeting, it is wonderful to see your love for us — two people who began as strangers bringing an elephant backpack, some snacks and some bubbles to a play date where they talked gibberish and weren’t really sure how to play. Yet here we are. A family of three, still learning about each other and enjoying life together. Thank you for being such a brave boy.

With all my love,

Mommy

Oh Snow…

Oh Snow…why oh why do you have to come? 

I enjoy a beautiful snowfall as much as the next gal, but I would be very happy to enjoy it two or three times a year (with Christmas being a requirement).  Yes, I realize that November 10th is actually on the later side for us getting at least some amount of snow. Yes, I realize I live in Minnesota and we generally have snow on the ground from November until March (or April), and that I should just embrace it. And yes, I realize no one wants to hear complaining. While I should be “used” to it and perhaps even loving it, I’m still a warmer-weather fan. 

In this season of being thankful, however, I have come up with three positive statements about our start of the 2014/2015 snowy season:
1. A snowy ground looks much nicer than a crunchy brown ground
2. At this time of year, snow does bring out a lovely Christmas spirit
3. I get to wear my new Birthday Boots!

Speaking of Christmas, Oliver has officially caught the Christmas bug! I don’t know where he has been hearing about Christmas, but he’s wanting to look at all of the holiday toy catalogs, talking about Santa, putting bubbles on his chin and calling himself Santa, and more. Yesterday we were at Target, which has a boatload of Christmas gear out, and Oliver wanted to see it all. He also thought we needed it all! I was able to keep us to two Christmas plates (the little divided kids kind) and one mini Christmas tree spatula, but boy is he excited. I guess he takes after his mommy (who has been itching to start playing Christmas music).

Oliver is so excited that when we woke him up this morning and told him it had snowed, he got the most amazed look on his face and then said “Santa come?”

What a cutie! And what a long haul we have until Christmas. I am trying to explain the real meaning behind Christmas — that it is a celebration of Jesus’ birth. I never thought I would compare the birth of our Lord and Savior in this way, but I found myself this morning explaining to Oliver that “Santa and Christmas is a fun way for us to celebrate Jesus’ birthday, kind of like your train party was how we celebrated your birthday!” Oh my.

Well, Christmas is still a ways away. More recently we celebrated Halloween with our little fire fighter. Oliver had a blast and did a pretty good job trick or treating (though he struggled to grasp the concept that the person giving the candy puts it in his bucket, that he shouldn’t just grab handfuls). He and his neighbor friend made it to about a dozen houses, then it was back to our house for a little play time while the moms and dads had some time to catch up. Here he is all decked out and ready to go:

This is his "say cheese" look

Eager to get trick or treating!

We are also only 8 days away from the first time we met Oliver. If you have time, you should check out the post about our first meeting — see how much Oliver has changed in just a year! Here is more about that wonderful, exciting, special…and a little scary…moment.

Finally, a few of Oliver's favorite phrases as of late: "I okay" and "I fine"; "Happy Christmas" and "Ho Ho Ho Merry Christmas"; "No, you do it" or "No, I do it".