Our first meeting -- more than 21 months in the making -- has been set! We will be meeting Oliver at 10:00 Monday morning, November 18th. Oh my! Less than 3 weeks away. We will also get to meet his foster mom, which will be wonderful. This woman who has loved and cared for him. Nurtured and guided him. I can't imagine how she is and will be feeling. Tony and I have been keeping her and the rest of her family (husband and adult son) in our prayers. If you are the praying type, please consider adding them to yours.
Back to the meeting...
It's important to remember that we arrive in Seoul at 5:30 or 6:00 pm Sunday night, that we will be jet lagged, turned around in the new city, tired from days of travel, etc. And we need to meet with our Korean social worker at 9:30 to go over paperwork. So we will be in country for just over 12 hours when all of this takes place. [insert panic-filled deep breath here]
The silver lining is that we were able to reserve a room at the agency's guest house, so we will be right there (or maybe a building over) -- no need to navigate the subway or communicate with a non-english speaking cab driver first thing in the morning. Whew!
We have heard that the guest house rooms are okay...they sound more dorm-like than hotel-like. However, there's community kitchen space, a washer and dryer (though someone posted a photo of the korean setting dial...no english instructions posted anywhere!), free wi-fi, and other folks who are dealing with the same stuff we are. And the big bonus is that you are "right there" for every agency appointment. No trekking across town. No getting lost. Just right there. In our overwhelmed, jet lagged, "holy cow is this really happening" state, that will be priceless.
So, while you are enjoying your Sunday evening dinner, we will be meeting our son for the first time. I can't wait!
Thursday, October 31, 2013
Monday, October 28, 2013
We Have a Court Date!
Monday morning, October 28th. I'm sitting at my desk, anxiety levels already rising as I wait and hope for news. Obsessively checking my personal email. Making sure I didn't miss a phone call. And then I see it. The subject says it all: Court Date Assigned!
Praise God!
It's official. Tony and I have been issued our appointment for the Korean Family Court. We will stand before the Judge and answer questions (via a translator) on Friday, November 22nd at 10:30 a.m.
What does this mean?
It means we leave for Korea on Friday, November 15th. As in 2.5 weeks from now! It also means that we will get to meet Oliver soon -- likely November 18th or 19th. Amazing.
As some of you know, Tony has become quite the expert at collecting credit card points and airline miles. We have benefited from this on a number of occasions, and will be cashing in all (or nearly all) of them for this first trip to Korea. Flying via miles means we have a bit of a journey ahead of us -- including an overnight in LA on the way there (we might get to see my brother, which would be terrific) and an overnight in Narita, Japan on the way home. And given the time and day difference, our final leg of the return flight departs Japan at 3:30 Sunday afternoon, landing in Minneapolis at 11:30 Sunday morning...all November 24th!
Work on Monday, November 25 might be tough.
When will we get to bring Oliver home?
We don't know when we will be making the second trip, and we won't know until after we return from the first trip. There are a few final steps that must take place in Korea before we are granted final approval. Once we receive final approval, we will book our second trip. We may end up celebrating Christmas in Seoul this year -- or New Year's Eve. But no matter what it means Oliver will be coming home soon.
An important note: until we receive the final approval, we are not allowed to share photos and details in public settings (i.e., Face.book). Legally he is not our child and we are being careful to respect the agencies' wishes (a.k.a. demands). Therefore please continue to keep comments and questions off of any social media sites until Tony and I make the big announcement. Thank you!
In Other News
Our house is full of new carpet! The lower level has been fully carpeted; the upper level has had the old carpet replaced with new. That means we have begun setting up Oliver's room...and just in time!
We were blessed by a number of friends -- and terrific and tireless In-Laws -- giving of their time and energy to help us with all of the moving of furniture, removing of carpet, pulling of staples, etc. Tony and I alone couldn't have managed the job and we are grateful for everyone's help and support.
Now, it's back to the grindstone. We have a lot to prepare for in such a short time. It still doesn't feel real!
Praise God!
It's official. Tony and I have been issued our appointment for the Korean Family Court. We will stand before the Judge and answer questions (via a translator) on Friday, November 22nd at 10:30 a.m.
What does this mean?
It means we leave for Korea on Friday, November 15th. As in 2.5 weeks from now! It also means that we will get to meet Oliver soon -- likely November 18th or 19th. Amazing.
As some of you know, Tony has become quite the expert at collecting credit card points and airline miles. We have benefited from this on a number of occasions, and will be cashing in all (or nearly all) of them for this first trip to Korea. Flying via miles means we have a bit of a journey ahead of us -- including an overnight in LA on the way there (we might get to see my brother, which would be terrific) and an overnight in Narita, Japan on the way home. And given the time and day difference, our final leg of the return flight departs Japan at 3:30 Sunday afternoon, landing in Minneapolis at 11:30 Sunday morning...all November 24th!
Work on Monday, November 25 might be tough.
When will we get to bring Oliver home?
We don't know when we will be making the second trip, and we won't know until after we return from the first trip. There are a few final steps that must take place in Korea before we are granted final approval. Once we receive final approval, we will book our second trip. We may end up celebrating Christmas in Seoul this year -- or New Year's Eve. But no matter what it means Oliver will be coming home soon.
An important note: until we receive the final approval, we are not allowed to share photos and details in public settings (i.e., Face.book). Legally he is not our child and we are being careful to respect the agencies' wishes (a.k.a. demands). Therefore please continue to keep comments and questions off of any social media sites until Tony and I make the big announcement. Thank you!
In Other News
Our house is full of new carpet! The lower level has been fully carpeted; the upper level has had the old carpet replaced with new. That means we have begun setting up Oliver's room...and just in time!
We were blessed by a number of friends -- and terrific and tireless In-Laws -- giving of their time and energy to help us with all of the moving of furniture, removing of carpet, pulling of staples, etc. Tony and I alone couldn't have managed the job and we are grateful for everyone's help and support.
Now, it's back to the grindstone. We have a lot to prepare for in such a short time. It still doesn't feel real!
Thursday, October 17, 2013
The Roller Coaster, Reflections & Things I'm Thankful For
Roller Coaster
I've started, deleted and re-started this post a number of times now. I just can't quite find the proper way to express how I am feeling, what I am thinking and what is (or isn't) happening in the world of "bringing Oliver home."
As with any roller coaster, this journey has had it's highs and lows (with more to come, I'm sure). Last week, getting the new photos, I felt a surge of happiness and hope. But by Friday afternoon, after another week of no news on our court date, I began to feel deflated. Hopeless.
Yesterday several families were given court dates (shared on facebook) -- families whose paperwork went to the Family Court on the same day as ours. Tony and I were both full of excitement and anticipation. My heart was racing. I checked my email constantly. I kept checking my phone for a possible missed call.
Unfortunately, there was no phone call. No email. Nothing.
I feel crushed. People say to be patient, to trust in God's timing, that it will all be worth it in the end. And yes, those things are absolutely true. I know they are true. However, knowing and feeling are two different things! And right now I'm feeling very very low. The "can't stay awake, can't get out of bed, crying spontaneously in the car" kind of low.
Reflections
These feelings are not helped by the fact that it is October. It has been five years since Tony and I began the journey to add to our family. In those five years friends have had one, maybe two (or more) children. Friends have gotten married....and pregnant. Life has continued, as it is destined to do. Yet in many ways I've been in limbo for so much of the past five years. My patience has been tried and testing time and time again. I am tired of being patient! (for a recap of our journey, you can see this blog post from September 2012: click here)
Well, enough Debbie Downer for one morning! Hopefully the "what I know" will win out over the "how I feel" and I'll start to perk up again soon.
Thankful
On to something more upbeat. There are a number of things I've discovered or experienced recently that I'm very thankful for.
1. The Delay Start feature on our washing machine
2. Keypad lock for the front door -- no key needed!
3. Working with a local carpet installer instead of a big box store -- not only is it great to use a local person, but it also allows us to do sections at a time instead of the whole house
4. Being able to run outside (rain recently forced me back to the gym and the treadmill...I forgot how much more enjoyable an outdoor run is to an indoor/treadmill run)
5. The anti-slip product you can place under bathroom rugs so they stop sliding around all the time.
Well, that's all I have for now. Hopefully the next post will include a court date and travel plans!
I've started, deleted and re-started this post a number of times now. I just can't quite find the proper way to express how I am feeling, what I am thinking and what is (or isn't) happening in the world of "bringing Oliver home."
As with any roller coaster, this journey has had it's highs and lows (with more to come, I'm sure). Last week, getting the new photos, I felt a surge of happiness and hope. But by Friday afternoon, after another week of no news on our court date, I began to feel deflated. Hopeless.
Yesterday several families were given court dates (shared on facebook) -- families whose paperwork went to the Family Court on the same day as ours. Tony and I were both full of excitement and anticipation. My heart was racing. I checked my email constantly. I kept checking my phone for a possible missed call.
Unfortunately, there was no phone call. No email. Nothing.
I feel crushed. People say to be patient, to trust in God's timing, that it will all be worth it in the end. And yes, those things are absolutely true. I know they are true. However, knowing and feeling are two different things! And right now I'm feeling very very low. The "can't stay awake, can't get out of bed, crying spontaneously in the car" kind of low.
Reflections
These feelings are not helped by the fact that it is October. It has been five years since Tony and I began the journey to add to our family. In those five years friends have had one, maybe two (or more) children. Friends have gotten married....and pregnant. Life has continued, as it is destined to do. Yet in many ways I've been in limbo for so much of the past five years. My patience has been tried and testing time and time again. I am tired of being patient! (for a recap of our journey, you can see this blog post from September 2012: click here)
Well, enough Debbie Downer for one morning! Hopefully the "what I know" will win out over the "how I feel" and I'll start to perk up again soon.
Thankful
On to something more upbeat. There are a number of things I've discovered or experienced recently that I'm very thankful for.
1. The Delay Start feature on our washing machine
2. Keypad lock for the front door -- no key needed!
3. Working with a local carpet installer instead of a big box store -- not only is it great to use a local person, but it also allows us to do sections at a time instead of the whole house
4. Being able to run outside (rain recently forced me back to the gym and the treadmill...I forgot how much more enjoyable an outdoor run is to an indoor/treadmill run)
5. The anti-slip product you can place under bathroom rugs so they stop sliding around all the time.
Well, that's all I have for now. Hopefully the next post will include a court date and travel plans!
Tuesday, October 8, 2013
Photos! Photos!
After a three month hiatus on photo updates, Tony and I are jumping for joy that we were sent an update today! As usual, we received three photos. Surprisingly, however, one of the photos was taken during his September visit -- we didn't know they were even taking photos during the hiatus! In this photo he is wearing a top we sent him (yeah!) and he is opening his birthday package. I am so thankful that the social worker thought to capture this particular visit, even though she didn't have to. It means a lot to me.
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The other two photos are from October and you can see how tall he is! 37.4" tall...or as Tony said, "another 11 inches and he'll be able to ride most kid rides at Valleyfair." Here's one of the photos -- see his page for the final one.
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I can't wait to meet him!
The other two photos are from October and you can see how tall he is! 37.4" tall...or as Tony said, "another 11 inches and he'll be able to ride most kid rides at Valleyfair." Here's one of the photos -- see his page for the final one.
I can't wait to meet him!
Friday, October 4, 2013
Numbers Don't Lie
Our local agency has this little area on the side of their Korea News Page that tracks the basics: number of families home, number waiting to travel, number waiting for referrals. It's not always up to date, but I noticed today that they had a September 30th date on there.
You may recall from this time last year that adoptions came to a grinding halt, with families no longer traveling to bring home their children, and the rest of the families being left to wait and wonder. So as you consider the below information, keep this in mind: all but maybe one or two families who took placement in 2012 did so before mid-October of 2012.
As of September 30, 2013 (numbers are for families working with Children's Home only; not Korea-wide):
Placements in 2013: 6 children in 6 families
Placements in 2012: 82 children in 82 families
Placements in 2011: 94 children in 94 families
In addition, there are currently 73 families that have accepted a referral and are waiting to travel. Luckily Tony and I are pretty far along in the process, but we still don't know when we'll be heading over there. Never in our wildest dreams did we think we'd be childless in October 2013 -- and now we are facing a possible childless Thanksgiving 2013. Ouch.
This information is not "new" to me, but it hit me in a new way today. All of those children still waiting. All of those foster families that didn't anticipate parenting this long. All of the time passing by. There is certainly no shortage of things to pray about.
You may recall from this time last year that adoptions came to a grinding halt, with families no longer traveling to bring home their children, and the rest of the families being left to wait and wonder. So as you consider the below information, keep this in mind: all but maybe one or two families who took placement in 2012 did so before mid-October of 2012.
As of September 30, 2013 (numbers are for families working with Children's Home only; not Korea-wide):
Placements in 2013: 6 children in 6 families
Placements in 2012: 82 children in 82 families
Placements in 2011: 94 children in 94 families
In addition, there are currently 73 families that have accepted a referral and are waiting to travel. Luckily Tony and I are pretty far along in the process, but we still don't know when we'll be heading over there. Never in our wildest dreams did we think we'd be childless in October 2013 -- and now we are facing a possible childless Thanksgiving 2013. Ouch.
This information is not "new" to me, but it hit me in a new way today. All of those children still waiting. All of those foster families that didn't anticipate parenting this long. All of the time passing by. There is certainly no shortage of things to pray about.
Tuesday, October 1, 2013
Got an Email Today....
....and it made me want to throw my computer out of my office window (instead I loudly muttered in frustration -- my coworker is probably a bit scared of me right now):
This is actually the second such email we have gotten since our case was submitted to the Family Court (over 4 weeks ago...but who's counting!).
In truth, I prefer getting the above message over just twisting in the wind. I'm part of a couple of facebook groups for folks adopting (one is for families through our local agency, the other is for families with our Korean agency (meaning they are from around the world)). When I see that court dates are being issued I begin to check my email constantly, on edge and full of anxiety. So at least I can stop hoping for good news today.
Sorry I don't have better things to share...maybe next time!
This is a communication to share with you recent proceedings in the Korea Program before they are posted on the Weekly Update on the online Korea Newspage. We did receive Court dates for a few families this morning, but we did not receive dates for you or three others of the families whose Court Submission date was August 30, 2013. I cannot give any more identifying information about the families/children for whom the Court Dates were issued today other than to share that their Court Submission dates were also on August 30, 2013. I would expect that the rest of this August 30 group (you and three other families) will be received any time now. Again, we do not have any indication that there is any issue with your case and there have been no supplemental requests from the judge regarding you.)
This is actually the second such email we have gotten since our case was submitted to the Family Court (over 4 weeks ago...but who's counting!).
In truth, I prefer getting the above message over just twisting in the wind. I'm part of a couple of facebook groups for folks adopting (one is for families through our local agency, the other is for families with our Korean agency (meaning they are from around the world)). When I see that court dates are being issued I begin to check my email constantly, on edge and full of anxiety. So at least I can stop hoping for good news today.
Sorry I don't have better things to share...maybe next time!
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